Fear and Love

I’ve fallen in love plenty of times in my life.

I remember falling in love with baseball at about the age 5 – something I’ve never fully recovered from. I fell in love with my mom long before that. I fell in love with chocolate donuts in about 4th grade, as is evidenced by my fifth grade school picture. I fell in love with Isaiah, Joshua, and Carina the very second I saw them. I remember very vividly being not even able to speak – I was so overcome with emotion.

I fell in love quite some time ago with Maya, and the truth is I am still falling. And what excites me about that is that I see no end to it. The longer I am with her, the more fully I know her (and she, me) the more I come to understand there are no limits to love; it will expand, increase, blossom and grow as long as you let it.

I say these things because my love for God has worked in much the same way. I began to truly fall in love with God at about 19 years old, and my love for him has only expanded over time. I found grace to be truly amazing, forgiveness to be humbling, and mercy to be overwhelming.

However, I also know the bible (and many well-intentioned Christians) say we should have a “healthy fear” of God, also, but I seem to be having a problem with this term lately, probably because I’m still trying to understand how those two words go together. Where is there “health” in “fear”? I guess when a building is on fire it would be good to have fear of that fire. Or if your house were broken into in the middle of the night, it would be justified to have a fear for your life or children.

But why has the Christian community, in its evangelistic efforts, so often treated God more like a fire or a thief?

The question every non-Christian in the western world has heard (and probably hates) is “Do you know where you would go if you died tonight?” I can’t help but think there is more fear in this question than there is health, and certainly there is more fear than love. I know there are some who would argue “NOT TRUE! God’s love saves people from hell.” I agree with that. But is that what we are communicating?

How come Jesus never asked that question? How come he talked so much more about the Kingdom of God, love, justice, mercy, and compassion than he did about fear and hell and condemnation? And when he did speak of “hell”, wasn’t it to the religious leaders of the day who were, by their rules and regulations, keeping people away from true love?

Then why, as Christians, are we so concerned with instilling a “healthy fear” into people that will, most likely, never lead them to love?

I know it’s probably infinitely more difficult, but while I am alive, I will choose to love, as closely as I know how, to the way Jesus does. “There is no fear in love, because perfect love drives out fear.” I really believe that.

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